Game of Thrones S8 E3 - A well-directed yet disappointing episode (SPOILERS Beware)

We're half way through Game of Thrones' final season, yet as much as I enjoy GoT, I feel the latest episode was quite a let down in some respect.

SPOILERS ALERT!!

To be fair, it's quite a well-directed episode, great acting and reasonably good CG and loads of practical effects. But I was let down by the tactics employed by the defending party aka everyone in Winterfell, but also due to the plot holes and plot armours.

• The Dothraki cavalry charge, yet there's no follow-up in terms of tactics
  ->Everyone else stayed behind watching the Dothraki's flaming scythes get snuffed out
• The cavalry charged before artillery was fired, risking friendly-fire
• The artillery seemed to only have been used once
• Conveniently Ser Jorah survived this charge, returned, just to be killed again later on while protecting Daenaerys.
• When the army of the dead started charging toward Winterfell, artillery fire should not have stopped, but what did we get instead?
  -> It's cool that the dragons rode by Daenaerys and Jon swooped in to buy some time, but once they were gone chasing the Night King, isn't it obvious that artillery and arrows should have resumed?
• I'll give the people of Winterfell the benefit of the doubt for not knowing the Night King is able to raise people from the dead even when they are underground - aka don't know the range of the "Raise Dead" skill
• So many people died in the crypt, yet Varys, Tyrion and Sansa survived 
• The commanding officers in the battle such as Grey Worm, Sir Brienne and Sir Jaime had thick plot armours that prevented them from dying.
• Jon went back to the castle, forsaking his allies such as Sam who are clearly in trouble. Clearly the man had a purpose, yet he's just stuck because of a blue-fire spitting dragon.
• -> The resurrected dragon melted the castle walls in 3 seconds yet the rocks Jon hid behind also had plot armor where they didn't melt
• One of the White Walkers could hear blood dripping in the library, yet all the White Walker generals couldn't hear Arya lurking in the Godswood while she waited for her chance to pounce on the Night King
  ->Did she turn her face into a White Walker and managed to sneak about?
  ->If she could do that, why was she so afraid of getting caught in the library full of walkers?
  ->Sure she had the Faceless Men's training, but overall that's just terrible writing
• The Night King was built up to be this terrible figure that inspired fear throughout the previous seasons, only to be killed by an underwhelming drop knife + stab tactic
  -> Logically, he should have just crushed Arya's windpipe while she was dropping her knife
• Who is Azor Ahai? Arya? Jon? Daenarys?
  ->"He's the lord's chosen, born amidst salt and smoke", "wake dragons out of stones", reforge the great flaming sword
  ->don't think anyone fits all of the above, but it doesn't matter anymore, does it?
• Now that the sub-boss the Night King is gone, we're left with Cersei at King's Landing.
• Is this the ending we deserve? Where is the tension now that we're left with humans at war?
  ->Wouldn't it be better if a fraction of the Winterfell dwellers survived and fled south while the Night King and his merry band of undead marched towards the south to show Cercei how to pee her pants?
  

The episode gave us a tremendous sense of hopelessness - the undead do not fear death, do not tire, numbers only grow as time passes. As we see Winterfell's defense line fall one-by-one, we can't help but search for glimmers of hope. An unexpected hope was foreshadowed when Melisandre gave her short speech about "Brown eyes, green eyes and blue eyes", and it was fulfilled when we saw the Night King and his grand undead army perished by a good stab. 

A huge sigh of relief it was, Bran was not killed, and the survivors of the onslaught survived all thanks to Arya the ultra-silent assassin. Yet this end was unsatisfying. Almost too easy after all the build-up. Now it's just Cersei and her grand army comprising of many ships from Euron and many men from her own house, the Golden Company and Ironborn, likely outnumbering the North's. But take out the Night King, and the tension, mystery and expectation are much less palpable. 

In a way, this is to be expected. The fight for the throne after a common threat is gone. This is, after all, a Game of Thrones.

In an alternate reality, a figure slowly walks towards the Iron Throne, followed by a chilling mist, an icy howl from the wind. The figure turns and faces his men, slowly sits and claims his throne, watching with his piercing blue eyes as the world of men in Westeros is no more. 

FWD: Nurse reveals the top 5 regrets people make on their deathbed

So this was an article I stumbled upon a while back, and I have now decided to share it here on my blog,

1. To serve as a constant reminder of the important things in life: not money, not sports cars, but these.
2. To share this good read with my fellow readers
3. To let it forever be in one of my archives so that I can look it up easier compared to Facebook
4. To remind myself that this is one of the rare articles that could bring me to tears

Pasting starts here, originally written by a nurse working in palliative care:

For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives. People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality.

I learnt never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way,you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again. When you are on your deathbed, what  others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happine(ss)

Pasting ends here...................................................................................................................

I was originally tempted to pay my tributes to the original author by referencing it using the APA 6th style, but I was unable to identify him/her, as this article surfaced in the web around 2011, and possibly even before that. Many online publishers have copied and pasted pretty much the same thing and I was unable to pinpoint the original author due to poor referencing. And also, since I could not determine whether karenstan.net is a news page or a blog, I just decided to ignore it and just give the original link from FB here, so..

- See more at: http://www.karenstan.net/2013/11/11/nurse-reveals-top-5-regrets-people-make-deathbed/#sthash.M0uPXp4r.dpuf

P.S. If you know who the original author was, please do drop me a comment below. :)

Until next time!

-Shinn

Dota 2 - 10 Reasons Why the Transition was a Bad Experience for Me + mini-Review

I'm sure the word Dota is no stranger to anyone who's been into an internet cafe, or owns a computer. But today I'm not gonna talk much, just a little about Dota 2 - a standalone sequel to the immensely popular Warcraft III mod, Defence of The Ancients.

IGN's Video Review:


Gamespot's Video Review:


So this game has been around for quite some time, I received my beta invite like 1.5 years ago, I still remember it like it was yesterday, sounds like a cliché i know, but it's the truth. And I still have my e-mail kept, I looked it up in my Steam inbox, and Voila! The date says June 23rd, so 1.5years sound about right. Screenshot below:

My Dota 2 Beta Invite

I was overjoyed when I received this cuz I was the first among my friends to be able to play this. So I played my first match of Co-op versus AI, and I didn't like choosing heroes so I randomed Invoker.Then I was like sh*t, i can't remember the invoke list, but you know what? I'm just gonna go with this cuz I want the extra gold. Nonetheless, it was definitely a bad experience at first cuz:

1. I had stopped playing Dota 1 for some time, skills were very rusty
2. Even in the original, I wasn't a very good Invoker player
3. I didn't know how to check the invoke list
4. Vastly different AI behaviour
5. We used to buy by left-clicking, then it was switched to right clicking
6. Searching for items was a pain in the ass at first
7. Different interface, icons, character models
8. Glyph of Fortification and Creep Kills/Denies were nowhere to be found until I noticed my bottom right
9. A minor one - the original's 'Sentinel vs Scourge' had become 'Radiant vs Dire'
10. The overworld map was darker overall, where the original was brigther; the map in the UI felt smaller too

Offline Mode Home Screen: I was selecting my AI difficulty here, as you can see, Unfair is the hardest as of now.

Hero Selection Screen V1: This is what I'd like to call - The Horizontal View, which I prefer less, but you do get to see the detailed facial animations of the heroes that we have all come to know and love.

Hero Selection Screen V2: This is the Grid View, where it's easier to select heroes based on availability, and type(S,A,I), the one I prefer.

Post-game Stats: My first ever perfect run against the Unfair AI, with no deaths and 26 kills. (Just only finished this match at 9pm Novermber 12th)

Even so, the change isn't so bad once you get used to it, and in fact, the change is for the better. The slicker GUI, the superb graphics, the sound design, item search and organisation - everything just looks and feel better. And I must say, I've already gotten to the point where I cannot, and won't ever wanna get back to the Warcraft original!!

I'm not trying to write a review here but I'll outline Dota 2's strengths and weaknesses:

+FREE to play

+Sleek, User-friendly GUI

+Excellent sound design (from the 'Zap' of Zeus' Thundergod's Wrath to the very familiar 'Mmmmooonster Kill')

Thundergod's Wrath: In an early version of the game, a well-timed screenshot showcasing the lightning bolts summoned by Zeus when his Ultimate is activated.

+Much better graphics and customization (Shadows, Anti-Aliasing, Ambient Occlusion, Texture, Post-processing.. you name it)

+Customizable hotkeys

+Instant gratification

+Constant updates significantly reduce bugs
+Highly balanced

+Steam workshop
+Infinite replay value
+Well-developed and has matured compared to other MOBAs like HON and LOL
+Highly entertaining and enjoyable when played with or against group of friends
+Reworked names such as Outworld Devourer from the original Obsidian Destroyer

-Updates can take you quite some time if you don't have a decent internet connection

-Requires internet to play LAN, which defeats the purpose of it (the LAN is currently only developed for the purpose of tournaments)

-The infamous item purchase bug
-VERY steep learning curve
-Complexity tends to push newcomers away

-Relatively high PC requirements compared to LOL and the original

-Hero roster still lack some heroes like Terrorblade

-Like all online games, some users are just jackasses

Utter Chaos: Sometimes there are just so many things happening on-screen that it's hard to keep track of them - until you die, of course, like the Undying here, no pun intended.

Closing Comments:
If you are a busy person and only play games for instant gratification, then look no further, Dota 2 is for you!! If you are looking for a competitive game with depth, strategy and challenge, look no further too, Dota 2 will suck you up!! If you like to play games with story, then of course MOBA games are not for you.

Simply put, Dota itself has a universal appeal, and can be very addictive. I've seen people who have put in >500hrs in it, than's more than the amount of time I spend in my Pokemon and Monster Hunter!! So it's Insanely addictive, and players must exercise caution and self-restraint not to overindulge in it.

Dota 2 is a well-polished, constantly updated, balanced and addictive MOBA game. Its visual aesthetics, combined with the superb sound design and distinctive heroes, have all made Dota 2 the sequel that we all deserve, and love.

Score: 9.0 Amazing

Attack on Titans #51 - Levi's Squad Review

Levi's Squad

The 46-pages-long Attack on Titans #51 provides an interesting conclusion to the previous mini-arc and foreshadows what's about to come in the future installments. Minor Spoiler: It seems we'll have to wait for a couple of issues before any titans are featured again.

Yes, I enjoy every read of AoT, but since it usually takes a month for Hajime Isayama sensei to release a new chapter, it kinda breaks the momentum, which is a bad thing really.

*I'm still deliberating whether I should write manga reviews with spoilers or not, of course each has its own pros and cons, the obvious being there wouldn't be anything to write about if I can't write anything that spoils the story for readers.

I read #51 here!

Humble Bundle - WB Games

Introducing the Humble Bundle!!



If you haven't heard about it, it's a site for you to purchase games at a price you'll never dream of.
This season they have the Humble WB Games Bundle, which will give you these games:

• Batman: Arkham Asylum Game of the Year Edition
• F.E.A.R. 2: Project Origins
• F.E.A.R. 3
• Lord of The Rings: War in the North

Just name your price, any amount will do, yes you didn't read it wrongly, ANY AMOUNT!!

THE HUMBLE WB GAMES BUNDLE: Support charity by buying games!

In addition, if you pay more than the average, now at 4.63USD, you'll unlock two more awesome games!

• Batman: Arkham City Game of The Year Edition
• Scribblenauts Unlimited

In a nutshell, if you pay 4.64USD or more, you'll instantly gain access to 6 awesome games that could easily cost you more than 50USD!! Additionally, you're supporting charity by buying games from Humble Bundle, I'd say it's a pretty awesome deal!

Now some of you might think that this is too good to be true, but I must say, this is not a scam and is 100% legit. I repeat, THIS IS NOT A SCAM! I've personally bought three Humble Bundles so far, and all of the Steam and Origin game keys worked like a charm!

PAYMENT: You can literally pay any amount you want for the four games, in addition to selecting the distribution of your payment. I usually go for the Default Split as shown above.

If you're not sure about the charity organization - We Can Be Heroes, it's part of DC's CSR programme - it's a non-governmental organization which organises DC merchandise sales, exclusively-autographed stuffs and the like, all in the name of charity, in which 50% of the sales profit directly goes to the benefit of the less-fortunate.

Just check out their website - http://www.wecanbeheroes.org/

STATS: Just look at how much people all around the world are willing to pay for these games!! Or rather, support charity!!

So what are you waiting for? Support charity today at https://www.humblebundle.com/  !!!

Blog update: Nov 10th, 2013

I'm a week away from my final exams, which is why I'm here in the first place.
1st - to get away from my boring revisions.
2nd - to update my blog
3rd - to post my review of XCOM
4th - to plan a revamp of my blog

As you can see, I'm planning to blog about different stuffs from here onwards. In my past few years, I only blogged about my personal issues and ranted angrily about some other stuffs.

But now, I've decided to change, to switch my blogging entries into something more of my lifestyle. You see, I read manga, I play games, I watch movies, I update myself with stuffs mostly from the geek side of the world.

Which is why I thought I should post my blogs with these relevant entries too, most probably reviews about games that I have played this year, or maybe reviews of each week's One Piece, Naruto, Bleach and Fairy Tail mangas - so stay tuned peeps(not that any of you are my regular readers, but whatever)!

Until then, ciao!

-Shinn

XCOM: Enemy Unknown, a very late review

So I finished my first playthrough of XCOM: Enemy Unknown on PC not long ago on September 7th, yes I'm about a year late to the party but this game didn't really impress me initially so I didn't wanna play it. But now that I've played it, I'm gonna say this was one hell of a ride for a TBS(Turn-based Strategy) lover like yours truly.

I hereby present to you my first ever game review in my blog, minor spoilers alert!

COVER ART: XCOM Enemy Unknown PC Box Art

Basic Info:
Developer:     Fireaxis Games, Feral Interactive
Publisher:      2K Games, Feral Interactive
Release Date: Oct 9th, 2012(NA) Oct 12th, 2012(Int.)
Genre:           Turn-based Strategy/Role Playing Game(TBS/RPG)
Game modes: Single player, Online multiplayer (2persons PVP mode)
Ratings:          Mature/Pegi 18
Platforms:       Windows, Macintosh, Xbox 360, PS3

OPENING: The game opens with an interesting, yet 'terrifying' quote, a prelude to what's about to come. (Aliens, UFO, anyone?) *Also, I had to shrink all the other images from XL to L, or else they would have crossed the line like this one did.

FIRST MISSION: Your first mission commences with only 4 squad members with the same armor and weapons, with randomly assigned names and no class specialization. Eg. Holly Clarke, which i prefer to read it as - Holy Clerk!!

As your new recruits gain experience in the battlefield and get promoted, they are randomly assigned into one of the 4 different classes that each has their own pros and cons.

1. Heavy
2. Assault
3. Sniper
4. Support

The Psionic class is an extra, special class that you'll not gain access until late game. Keep in mind that the Psionic class is not a separate class, but it builds upon your current class and enables your unit to gain access to additional Psionic abilities.Take my 'Omega' Summer Cheong for example, she's a Colonel ranked Sniper, but also has access to the Psionic abilities. Only Psionic-enabled units are able to wear the Psi Armor, where the Psi abilities are in purple, as shown in the 'HEADSHOT' screenshot below.

HEADSHOT: 'Omega' Summer Cheong prepares to snipe an Uber Ethereal with her Plasma Sniper Rifle. Her Psi Armor is easily the best armor you can eventually research and purchase in the game, but at $400, it doesn't come cheap .

The gameplay is divided into 2 segments: TBS on the battlefield, and Base Management during mission intervals. Battlefield TBS is self-explanatory - you're deployed into an area with alien activity, and you'll be ordered to Dispatch the enemies, Locate and escort a VIP back to base, Examine the UFO wreckage or Assault an alien base.

MISSION PREP: You'll eventually unlock 2 more squad slots to allow up to 6 units in your mission squad. It's just glorious when you have them lined up like this.

BASE MANAGEMENT: Facilities built adjacent to one another nets you the adjacency bonus. For example, every Satellite Uplink or Satellite Nexus built in adjacent will provide a +2 satellite capacity bonus.

The Base Management, however, is more complex than it seems, where early decisions will have significant repercussions. For example, if you bought extra Medikits from the Foundry(I actually bought 6, damn it), which heals 4 HP on use, it'd be a waste of money since you might not want all of your squad members to carry a Medikit, cuz you're only allowed to carry an extra item such as a Medikit, a Scope, or a Grenade in the early game. To remedy this, your Support class units are able to learn a skill that enables you to carry two items in a mission. For other classes however, it is wise to take a moment off to think about what to bring along.

LAUNCHING SATELLITES: I permanently lost 2 countries in my first playthrough, unfortunately, which was a shame.

However, that was just a small example of Base Management. A bigger example would be Launching Satellites. As you progress through the game, nations will have increased panic level due to unchecked alien activity without a satellite scanning the region. Therefore, it is imperative to launch as many satellites as possible at the start of the game to minimise panic and bring in the extra income per month as each satellite is launched for a nation.

In the case that the panic level of a nation has exceeded the threshold, the country will permanently withdraw from the Council, where any additional rewards you were receiving will be null from that point onwards. If 8 countries withdraw from the Council, it'll be an immediate game over. Micromanagement and careful planning are therefore important if you want to survive another planetary assault to see the ending and credits.

BARRACKS: The game gets better though: You can customise your squad member's names, skin colour, hairstyles, loadouts etc. The game certainly gets more interesting if you name your squad after your friends.

HUGE shoutout to my fellow blogger and friend: Quince Yap, my Major ranked Heavy class, codenamed 'Thunder' - checkout his awesome blog at http://mygfisguminho.blogspot.com/

UNIT CUSTOMISATION: Fairly late into the game, my boy Quince was gorgeously equipped with a Titan Armor, a Heavy Plasma, a Blaster Launcher, and a Scope lens for that +10 Aim. 

END GAME: It took me more than 20 hours to beat the game, and it was a fairly good run, as you can see, i did a little better than most people on the planet - I only lost 3 soldiers in the final level(whose names I won't be mentioning). I tried repeatedly to not lose anyone for more than 2 hours, but I just gave up in the end cuz it's too damn hard to not let anyone die.

Here's a video review by IGN's Steve Butts:

Here's another one by Gamespot's Kevin VanOrd:

Summary:

+Addictive, tension-filled TBS gameplay

+RPG elements - classes and skill tress make your squads progressively more powerful

+Soldier perma-death gives you an emotional attachment to your squadmates, especially if you name them after your friends

+Memorable and diverse cast of aliens

+Well-animated character models

+Complex base management economy makes each decision important

+High replayability

-Difficulty spike during final mission, especially in the last segment

-Equipment sorting during prep

-Boring and repetitive maps, for some reason, the UFOs never crashes into cities, only forests

-Dumb civilians who sometimes run towards aliens to be killed

-Camera foibles and visual glitches

-No selling option for extra equipments

Score: 8.5 GREAT

I'm very blessed

I'm a lone wolf.
You don't kacau me, I won't bite.
That simple.

Most of the time, in my university, I eat alone.
I don't need your pity though,
I'm perfectly capable of eating alone.
And I enjoy it actually, cuz making conversations with people is a pain I think.

These alone time are hard to come by these days,
I'd just prefer to have my meal while thinking, reminiscing and reflecting about myself and some memories which i hold dear.
If you come sit beside me, you interrupt me.
And I just have good enough manners, and some laziness also, to not tell you that.

Sigh, having good social skills to know people can be a pain too.
You can only have so many friends, and managing these budding, so called 'new friendships' is also a task I'm not fond of.
You kinda need to filter these friends like your fb friend requests i think.

Of recent events, i think i'm getting more and more patriotic with each passing day. I was, of course, devastated by the election day's results. Really, really sad that night, couldn't fall asleep, literally.

Be that as it may, recent events of black as silent protests have really got me going. I see hope and a brighter future for us all. I'm happy.

Even so, I get a lil sad and down sometimes, but I'm glad i have a habit of keeping things to myself. I don't go and announce to my friends I'm sad or down or depressed - that's just not who I am.

Being silent might seem unhealthy for some, but IMO, i think it teaches me to be strong. It serves as a constant reminder that I have to stay strong for myself, for I do not fancy relying on others, nor do I like the idea of sharing my inner-most thoughts with people.

Ultimately, I can classify myself as a recluse. Though I hardly think of myself as an introvert - I can be rather noisy and active when I feel like it; and I enjoy being a lone wolf when i need some alone time.

Over the years, I've picked up different speech patterns from my friends. Indeed I was an introvert, many years ago, until i gradually picked up my friends' speech patterns for my own usage. I TALK COCK, then I think at some point, I became LC, but I don't think I'm arrogant actually, just LC, in the way I talk.

Mayhap I've offended lots of people along the way, but I just like being blunt and straightforward. But recently, I'm kinda reflecting on this, it's just, old habits are hard to be rid of. Or rather, they're already part of who I am now. I like being blunt and straightforward, but I think it might have been too much at times, that I may have been a jerk.

Sigh, at the age of 19, approaching 20. I'm not proud to say that I'm still doing my soul-searching, ie. I'm still unsure of what kind of guy I wanna be. It frustrates me every time I think about it.

See, I'm the kind of guy, who's so bold that he ain't afraid of dying or doing anything, which is why I don't really give a rat's ass as to how people think about me, well, usually, and in most cases. But recently, I conduct little surveys by asking a few friends what do they think about me, cuz I want to know whether my, so-called 'friends' are comfortable being around me.

Pretty much, I'll iterate that I'm perfectly capable of living alone and dying alone when the time comes, but of course, having a mate to sleep on the very same bed for the next couple of decades is a good thing to hope for, and to strive for. Though for years I've always been kind of sad when I think that I'm always, and always will be the kind of guy who's only good enough to be a friend, and nothing more.

Not to mention my mom who keeps on pressuring me about gf stuff, it does make me speechless and sad most of the time, but I do manage to cope with it. I guess at some point, I've already hinted that I might most probably live the rest of my life in my man-cave Alone.

And yes, should that scenario ever be my future, I'll just regret not being able to name my children Bruce and Scarlett. I told a couple of friends about this, and one of 'em told me these are good names to go with my last name. I'm glad actually. And sometimes, I do picture myself calling out their names. My imaginary kids look different each time i think about them, but the love of my life, that woman smiling behind my imaginary kids, she's always a blur. But she does always look like the woman of my dreams, yea, it's just a dream, and it may stay, just a dream.

At this point, I still can think of anyone who'd be willing to spend the rest her life with me. People say you'll find The One at some point in life. I doubt that. I think it's more to ourselves than destiny. I mean, what's destiny gonna do for your life, if she gives you a girl right in front of you, but you don't know how to cherish and grab the chance presented?

Haha, I try. I try hard in fact, and most of the time, I do realise I am no fun to talk with. It's obvious, rather obvious. It's sad, but I live with it. I've been living my whole life to this point with that in mind, what's there to lose?

And I do have so many things in mind that I wanna accomplish while I'm alive, that includes owning my very own house by the age of 30. My mom finished-off her instalment at the age of 25, she told me, I wonder if I can even reach my target of 30, let alone 25.

Which brings me to my Lamborghini dream. I pledge to myself, in the hopes that I could own  a Lamborghini by 40. Haha, it's a big dream, and yes it seems so far far away. 20 years more - two decades more filled with so much doubts and uncertainties, I wonder if I could make it through, and if I could, with whom?

Will my current list of friends whom I hold so dear, walk with me till the ends of the earth? Until Death decides to take one of us away? I doubt it, but true friends stay true, and the bond stays strong and never wavers, I will it to be so, and wish it'll turn out so too.

I'm good at many things, it's like I have a natural affinity to many kinds of stuffs - these were always my confidence boosters, for my academic results were nothing to be proud of. But then, I wish I could be good at so many other stuffs as well. I'm even so greedy that, say, if I were given a magic lamp or 7 dragon balls to make a single wish, I'd wish "to know and understand all there is to know and understand in this world and universe; no knowledge will be out of my reach"

Haha, such a wild dream. And a very impossible one too. Say, if magic truly exists, I'd create or learn a spell that may grant me immortality just to pursue that dream of learning all but limitless knowledge. How nice if I could live for eons and learn and evolve. But witnessing the deaths of so so many loved ones can be a pain too.

This life I'm living, I think I'm very blessed, and for that, I'm truly grateful, and happy. I try to live a life with no regrets, but of course, we always have something that we regret doing or not doing. I always do, and I always do wish I could turn back the time and rewind things and incidents, to make things better.

And still, everything's a dream. AND IT'S TIME TO WAKE UP. i mean sleep.

***This post(and all of my blog posts actually) was(were) never intended for anyone to read, so if you somehow stumbled upon this by chance, thank you so much for reading. I'd very much like to meet you people who'd check my blog haha, it's just so surprising and exciting really.

***This is not an assignment, so I don't really do proofreading. And yes, I know there are grammatical errors, but I'm just too lazy to proofread what I wrote an hour ago. I just don't care, really.


Shinn
May 9th 2013. 2.50am 

Blog Update, November 18th

Have been much less active in the facebooksphere, the twittesphere and the blogosphere these days.
Lazy, mostly,
and
I think I just currently enjoy my life being at home and with my family - siblings, especially :)
watching dramas,
gaming together,

window shopping,
teasing and jeering at one another,
the endless laughter,
simply,
just having some good ol' fun,
with the people that grew up with me. ^^

Anyway, I'm gonna leave for Nepal in 2 days time,
which is on Tuesday(morning flight btw).
Feel kinda lazy to go,
like i said,
I really enjoy the peace and quiet now - well, after spending 4 months in Miri,
that's the least I could say for myself. 

(You can't expect me to have the desire to go out all week, can you? :P)

This is Nepal.. err, well, some little parts of Nepal.. XD (Kathmandu I think)

But then, well, since most, if not all, things have been prepared,
And my supportive Mama Gan has helped me pay for the un-cheap fee,

I suppose there aren't any excuses not to go. ;)

FYI, Nepal is a country in between India and China, famous for its mountains and scenic beauty.
Fun fact: There are actually 2 mountain trails,
and thus 2 Everest Base Camp -
 leading towards Mt. Everest's peak,
the north one is in China,
and guess what?
the opposite one is in Nepal!

Proud Family Achievement:
In 2008, Mama Gan's actually hiked to the Nepal Base Camp which has an altitude of 5364m,
Haha, I'm just so damn proud of her
that I've bragged about it to my fwens a couple of times (Sorry XD)

BTW,
This'd be my very first solo experience to go hiking/travelling in a country that far away,

an unfamiliar place w/ lots of strangers.

I'll admit, it does feel kinda scary.
Meeting new people,
Treading on unfamiliar grounds,
Seeing a different piece of sky..
It's all very daunting,
But I'm thinking I'll enjoy it.
Well then, wish me luck. =)

Till next time!
Adios! 

Kitchen Turmoil

Notes I wrote to warn that 'special' someone.

I'm seriously pissed off by the fact that some retard floor-mates dared to use my cooking utensils, cutlery and crockery without permission, and the fact that they'd never washed them nicely after use just enrages me to no end.

Leaving food stains and oil patches on my stuffs, you think you're my best friend? Even ordinary friends don't do that, you unthoughtful schmuck!!

Try me

A day fully on E3 - Electronic Entertainment Expo

Hmm, it's been so long since the last awkward post/adaptation of this blog.

A year and 3 months plus passed since the 21st February 2010 update.


And for this update, on 8th June 2011, a very beautiful day,

I literally spent my whole afternoon till evening, watching E3( Electronic Entertainment Expo ) 2011's Press Conferences.

Microsoft, Sony and Nintendo - The Big Thr33 in the Gaming Industry

Well, since most of my friends don't know much about gaming (cuz we're interested in very different things ), I don't think I should say much about them anyway, since anyone'd be bored to death.

Hmm, anyhow, here's a little coverage:

1. Microsoft announced a remastered and remake of Halo: Combat Evolved, which is Halo 1, coming this 2011 Holiday Season. And secondly, the announced Halo 4, which is set to be released in 2012.

2. Sony, on the other hand, revealed their Next Generation Portable(NGP), which was finally unveiled as Playstation Vita(PSVita). Vita means 'Life', in Latin. (Life, can you imagine? Come on, Sony, you can do better than that!! Vita? Life? Gimme a break!!) NGP sounds a hell lot better.

Now, it certainly seems cool with the improved RAM and processors, with the stunning multitouch 5 inches OLED display, with a touchpad at the rear, and the dual-analog sticks(which the PSP should already have ages ago, Good Thinking, SONY!!), the Vita really packs a punch, and Uncharted really looks great on it, can't wait!

3. Last but not least, Nintendo, folks. Well, the Nintendo 3Ds launched around 3 months ago, but it doesn't sell as good as expected, it seems. And with the Wii nearing its eclipse in its life, we've expected Nintendo to reveal its latest console, with a brand new name.

However, it did surprise everyone, i suppose, cuz we'd thought they'd come out with a way Better name, not Wii U!! Wii U, We You? Sounds stupid and not very innovative, isn't it?

Erm, the new touch-sensitive 6.2 inches screen of the new controller seemed cool and all, capable of bringing a new revolution, it seems, but I think it easily gets old after a few years. Just look at the Wii at my home, just got it around 3-4months, and it's gathering dust already.

I was getting hyped up for expecting the Wii 2, cuz months and months of speculation and guessing the Wii 2 will surpass its predecessors with updated HD graphics like the X360 and PS3, and maybe even better, but it certainly disappointed me when i watched the trailer. Not so cool after all when it comes to graphical power for Nintendo, look at all those pixelated games from Gameboy Advance to Nintendo DS.. It's a turn down.

Clossing comments: Definitely getting the PS Vita over the 3DS, although the name suck. Same goes for Halo, I can certainly say although Microsoft's Press Conference suck, I'd support Xbox 360 for the Halo franchise . However, PlayStation isn't a bad choice at all, since I owned the PS1 and the PS2, and till a recent year ago, the PSP. As for the Nintendo products like the Wii and the Ds, I just play Pokemon games on them, I don't fancy Mario and Zelda after all.

有一种幸福的滋味叫感念，有一种满足的情愫叫感念，有一种开心的感觉叫感念

有一种幸福的滋味叫感念，有一种满足的情愫叫感念，有一种开心的感觉叫感念。——题记

由于人的个体的不同和一个人在不同的时间心境、感悟的不同，对幸福的理解和体验也就千差万别。比如，对于饥寒交迫的人来说，一件棉衣一炉火、一块馒头一口水就足以让他感到莫大的幸福。而一个人在酒足饭饱之后，也许就没有这 种幸福的感觉，相反会觉得这是件再平常不过的事情，甚至，饱暖过度后再有这样的“殊遇”，简直就是痛苦之至的事；又比如，当人在痛苦不堪的时候，一个温暖 的问候，一句掏心的劝解，对那个人来说就是莫大的慰籍，可能还会使那个人猛然醒悟，从而走出痛苦的深渊。而对一个正沉浸在欢乐中的人来说，这也许根本就不 值得一提，甚至不屑一顾；再比如，人在迷惘徘徊的时候，一个鼓舞的眼神，一句鼓励的话语就足以让人从迷惑中清醒，从萎靡中崛起，感受到那暖暖的情意，觉得 那是一种怎样的幸福！但对于一个春风得意的人来说，这样的眼神他或许根本就不会在意，这样的话语他抑或根本就是不会去用心听。……

从 更深的层次理解，由于所处环境、所受教育、自身感悟力等的不同，人的需要由低到高的层次也就不同，对幸福的感受也就有了层次上的差别，对于同样的事物、同 样的际遇的感受也就不同，也有了幸福和不幸福截然不同的感受。注重物质的人也许得到钱财就会感觉到很幸福，但注重精神享受的人却并不会感到拥有那些东西就 是幸福。相反，一橱好书对于一个目不识丁的人来说，只不过是一堆无用的废物。……况且，不是谁都能心想事成，梦想成真。所以，说到底，幸福就成了一种心 态。

很长时间以来，幸福于我就是怀有一颗感念恩情的心。当我的内心充满着无限的感念时，所有的一切于我来说都是那么的美好和明媚！有了这样的感念，我的内心是那么的平和与满足、又是那么的开心和幸福。我因此不再忧虑不再恐惧不再不安不再寂寞不再迷离，也不再无所适从。

何尝不是！在我们生 活的这个世界里，一切的一切包括一草一木都对我们有恩。只要我们的心充满着感念，用感恩的心感念生命中一切值得感念的东西，这样，幸福就会充溢着我们的 心，我们就会感到无比的幸福。心存感念，心灵就会常葆纯净，良知就会俯仰无愧，生活的大树就会枝繁叶茂，万古长青。“你感恩生活，生活将赐予你灿烂的阳 光。”常怀感念之心，就会发觉世界是如此的美好，如此的让人眷恋。

——我感念，我幸福！

“谁言寸早心，报得三春晖。”我感念我的父母，是他们给予我生命，是他们给了我最无私、最深沉的爱，父母的爱让我以积极的心态面对人生，珍惜自己、珍惜未来…… 他们的爱是我一生最宝贵的财富，父母的爱是温暖、圣洁的代名词！父母的爱平常却不平凡，普遍却不普通，这是一种永远也报答不完的恩情，这样的恩情从我们呱 呱坠地的那一刻起就一直滋润着我们，守望着我们。在我们走过的春花秋月中，这恩情已汇成一片无法丈量的汪洋，让我们不能不去感念并力图回报。　　

高 山巍巍，使人崇敬，师恩如山，永铭我心；大海浩瀚，无法估量，师恩似海，永刻记忆。我感念我的恩师，是他教给我知识和做人的道理。他是我遮雨的伞，挡风的 墙，是他用自己的生命之光，照亮了我人生的旅途。那温和的眼神是无声的语言，曾让我对生活充满希冀；那严格的要求是燃烧的火焰，给过我多么巨大的热力；忘 不了他和风细雨般的话语，怎能忘他浩荡东风般的叮咛，荡涤了我心灵上的尘泥，鼓起我前进的勇气。那如春风、似瑞雨的谆谆教诲，化作我脑中的智慧，胸中的热 血，那如翠竹、似青松的铮铮傲骨，变为我行为的规范，做人的标准。他是我心中的一道彩虹，照耀着我堂堂正正地做人，踏遍心田的每一角，踩透心灵的每一寸， 满是对恩师的感念。

“爱的别名叫感恩”。我感念爱人的恩情，是他给予我爱情和亲情，让我尽享爱情的甜蜜与美好，让我明白生 命的意义和生存的价值，让我……我感念亲人，是他（她）们给予我快乐，是他（她）们让我享受着这么多友情的温暖和生活的香醇。我感念亲人在我开心的时候和 我分享，在我烦闷的时候听我诉说；感念他（她）们在我迷茫的时候给我指出我前行的方向，在我清醒的时候给我善意的指正。

永 远的朋友，永久的美好，真挚的情意，美好的祝福。我感念朋友们的随意而又不失礼仪，自若而又不无尊重。感念他（她）们让我循着友谊的涓涓细流听到流淌着的 快乐和惬意，听到那些让人温暖的故事。他（她）们就是我的一笔宝贵的财富。那每一句问候，那每一个关注都是一瓣瓣的心香、一份份的愉悦。无所谓远近，无所 谓年龄，也无所谓性别，也许他（她）身在咫尺，也许他（她）远在天涯，彼此相知、相牵、相助、相契，就是人间最惬意、最畅快、最温馨、最美丽的意境，就是 人间最真挚的感动！友情，自理解中诞生，升华中融洽；识于偶然，止于永久。他（她）们的灿烂笑容会长留我心中，他（她）们的亲切话语会永伴我左右，他 （她）们的热情激励将永远鼓舞我前行，他（她）们的关爱、帮助会永温暖我心房。

我同样感念我的同事们，他（她）们似和风如细雨，滋润着我的生活，他（她）们丰富了我的生活，增添了我的情趣。醇醇的一杯酒，淡淡的一盏茶，浅浅的一席话，悠悠的一段路，彼此述说着生活的故事，品味着生命的历程。

我感念生活中的酸甜苦辣，正是这不同的境遇，让我能坚强面对生活中的顺境与逆境，让我享受到生活的甜蜜与美好，让我明白了生活的真谛。

我 感念社会。文明的社会总能让我体会到大家庭的温暖。有了社会，才有了规则和秩序，我才有了一颗安稳的心；有了社会，我才会有定位，也才会找到自己的合适位 置；有了社会，我也才明确了努力和方向。是社会教会了我生存的本领，砥砺了我的意志，培养了我的品格，我才能真正成为一个有尊严、有理性的人。

我 感念大自然。我感念大自然无私的赐予人类阳光雨露、清风朗月、山水万物，无私的哺育着人类生息繁衍。我感念太阳给予我们的光明和温暖、感念蓝天给予我们的 纯静和不染、感念大地给予我们的宽容和浩博，我感念草原给予我们对“野火烧不尽，春风吹又生”的叹服，我感念大海让我有兼收并蓄的倾听……我感念大自然的 一切的一切，让我尽享花红草绿、莺飞燕舞的无尽美好！

我感念宁静在我孤独的时候以最温柔的手给我；我感念回忆在我痛苦的时 候以最好的笑容给我；我感念美丽让我的心灵永远年青；我感念苦难令我日益坚韧；我感念幻想使我依然向往明天．．．．．． 我感念这个寒冷的冬天有那么灿烂 的阳光温暖着我冰冷的身心，我感念这个枯燥的冬天有这么美丽的雪花愉悦着我寂寥的心情，我感念这个清寂的冬天有温馨的情谊在滋润着我寂寞的心田，我感念有 女儿带给我那么多开心和欣慰……

……

没有阳光就没有日子的温暖；没有雨露就没有五谷的丰登； 没有水源就没有生命；没有父母就没有我们自己；没有亲情友情和爱情世界就会是一片孤独和黑暗。我感念父母给了我生命，我感念老师教给我成长，我感念于朋友 的相识，使我得到那么多关爱，让我的心情因此明丽，使我的思想因此深邃，让我的生命因此精彩，让我的思绪因此澎湃！我感念所有关爱、关注、帮助我的人，他 （她）们让我感受到人世间的善良！我也感念那些伤害我的人让我学会了坚强，学会了宽容和豁达。我感念于提供实现自我价值的社会，我感念大自然，我感念顺 利，感念挫折，我感念痛苦，感念开心……我感念梦境将这一切的美好送到我身旁；我更感念时间将一切美好全部留下，给了我永远珍视的记忆！我感念命运赐予我 爱的芬芳、情的温馨，我感念生命赋予我真、善、美的真谛！

有人说，从某种角度说，爱是需要回报的，单向的爱，常常走不了多 远，没有回音的爱，也会让爱悄悄隐去。其实，感念恩情也是一种爱，感念就是一种回报，因为有些恩泽是我们无法回报的，有些恩情更不是等量回报就能一笔还清 的，惟有用纯真的心灵去感动去铭刻去永记，才能真正对得起给你恩惠的人。有了一颗感念之心，就会宽容，就会承受，就会付出，也就更懂得回报。所以，学会了 感念，才会在生活中发现美好，才会有一个好心情，也就会用微笑去对待每一天，用微笑去对待世界，对待人生，对待朋友，对待困难。这样就可以化腐朽为神奇， 化冰峰为春暖，化干戈为玉帛，生活的每一天就会充满开心、满足和幸福。

其实细想想，自己是一个多么幸运的人！无论何时何处 总有人给我帮助与关怀，一再的体会，一再的确信，是所有关爱我的人用爱心和宽容组成了我生活的点点滴滴，让我尘封的心灵绽开笑厣！其实细想想，幸福无处不 在。关键是有一颗感念恩情的心！我知道，这个冬天，我成熟！我为自己有这样感悟而开心，我更为让自己有了这份感悟的亲友而感恩，我知道，以后我不会再让父 母为我担心了，我也知道，我以后再也不会让所有关爱我的人不安了，我更知道，我已经找到了我自己，我会好好把握自己拥有的这一切，把握好自己的人生！我会 好好感念这一切的温馨温暖和温情！我会好好感念这一切的关注关心和关爱！

西方有一句谚语：“幸福，是有一颗感恩的心”。此 时此刻，我是幸福的，一种很真切的幸福把我包围！因为我沉浸在一种真真切切的感念之中。不是吗？在这个静静的夜晚，我能不受干扰地静静地看书，静静地码 字，静静地牵挂，默默地想念，这是一种多么令人满足的惬意——此时此刻，我感念这温暖房间里的一切一切：温暖的暖气、柔和的灯光、馨香的花香、陈年的普 洱，还有窗外在灯光下飘舞着、美丽着、晶莹着的雪花，还有那份浓浓的相思，淡淡的牵挂，还有那份幽幽的情意，绵绵的爱恋……这是怎样的一份满足，这是怎样 的一份开心，这又是怎样的一种令人陶醉的幸福！人生有此美好，足矣！这是一种多么幸福的感觉，这种感觉就叫感念！

因为感 念，我忘了琐碎的烦恼；因为感念，我用爱把我的心围绕；因为感念，我看到那么多的美好和幸福！因为感念，我重新体会到生活的乐趣、体味到生命的宝贵！当 然，我也会用我感念的心去理解生命中那剪不断理还乱的纷纷扰扰和迷蒙、用感念的心去净化生命中那扯不清道不明的恩恩怨怨和纠缠。感念，让我找到了人生路上 幸福的记号！

“感恩的心，感谢有你，伴我一生，让我有勇气做我自己；感恩的心，感谢命运，花开花落我一样会珍惜……”歌声响起来，品味着生命的甘醇丰厚与火热，感受着岁月的亲切自然和美好，感念又一次那么清晰地涌上心头，幸福就弥漫了整个心间……

幸福就是有一颗感念恩情的心啊！

——我感念，我幸福！

Posted by a guy/lady named :表白吧

Adapted at
3.36pm
21 February 2010

閱讀，這份禮物

千年以前，潘朵拉從宙斯手上接過禮物盒

因為好奇而將它打開

所有的疾病、災厄、和平、嫉妒、愛情......全都降臨人間

她慌張地蓋上，盒子里只剩下 [希望]

書本也像裝著生命面貌的盒子

翻動刹那，再度揭開她留下的期待與希望

20世紀謝幕以後，書的樣子以超乎想像

人們才漸漸明白它的背後，承載了千言萬語的靈魂

輕輕捎來生命信息，有些糾成遺憾、有些結成幸福

透過閱讀，才有千絲萬縷情感的交流

原來每一本書，

都像生命凝結而來的禮物。

Boredom

That little boi boi is bored.
On some level, he suppose that boredom is a good thing. Considering his present environment, the opposite of boredom could well be life threatening. Perhaps he should be grateful. Perhaps...
Nope. Nope, still bored. Impossible to be grateful for being bored. There are simply too many interesting things going on in the world to tolerate boredom for even a moment.
It's probably his mind that is to blame. His mind is always racing, always thinking, always conceiving new ideas, new concepts. His mind chafes against boredom, rages against the very notion of tedium. He thinks about a friend of his who was a coffee addict, claiming that the reason he regularly put junk up his mouth was that he was bored, and having a sip of coffee helped to counteract the threat of impending tedium.

***Some really random things a klutz wrote, just to rectify boredom.=]

2.56am

22 November 2009

Truant?

I know i am not supposed to be here right now,

I was supposed to be there.

I know i am not supposed to blog here right now,

I was supposed to be there.

It all started since that fateful tuesday,

the very 1st time in my life,

I didn't go schooling,

for no reasons.

I played truant.

And now,

I regret it.

I'm puzzled.

I don't know what to do.

***Flashback***

[D Tuesday]

It was already 6am, or more than that, actually.

He felt someone shaking him, calling his name, trying to wake him up.

Yet, he didn't.

All he did was just ignoring them.

Around half past twelve in the afternoon,

He was awaken from his deep slumber.

'Another 1 hour and 15 minutes, my bros are gonna come back home.'

He thought to himself.

[D Wednesday]

A Miserable day, indeed.

He again, woke up at 6.45am, which was the time he and his family usually depart from home.

Quickly, he ran towards the bathroom.(Although it's just beside his bedroom)

All he knew was, he wanted to keep his promise.(Don't ask me what promise, kay? I'm not that good at secret-telling)

He did what needed to be done, ASAP.

However, by the time he got out of the bathroom,

they were already gone.

Left with no other choice,

he changed to his schooling attire,

drank a mug of MILO,

and out he went.

Walking was fun, but DIRTY.

He was soaked wet when he reached his class,

it wasn't the first time already, so it didn't really matter.

[D Thursday]

He woke up pretty damn early, 10am.

He tried texting and calling, for guidance, for help,

as he was left alone at home.

No one replied, nor did they answer.

Frustrated, he sat on his bed,

didn't know what to do.

'They must have thought I didn't want to go to school.'

He thought to himself.

After brushing his teeth, he sat there, right on that spot on his bed which he was sitting a while ago.

He waited, for their reply.

He hoped the telephone would just beep, ringing would be need too much hope.

Finally, he rung.

He already knew it wasn't her though.

But, it was fine, and great.

Cuz someone called, at least.

Hern Yi was the one who called.

H.Y. told him about where he should be going later.

He reassured him that he will go, and he wanted to go to school.

Yes, He will indeed.

He swear, he isn't gonna make the same mistake ever again.

12.04pm

19.November.2009

The Day Which Wasn't Supposed To Be

When night falls,,,

2009's gonna end,

Cuz 2012's comin lol...

12/11/09

"We were warned"

The year everyone's been waiting for,

The end of the world,

is near.

Gonna catch this movie for sure,

but the initial plan has been changed,

so 'll probably go on friday.

2009 is really coming to an end,

i don't know why, but i just get the feeling that this year just flew

Everything just happened so fast.

It's as if i have just had my PMR yesterday.

And i already have to face SPM now.

HECK...

I don't know how am I gonna do that...

Today's a good day,

with us singing and winning and stuffs...

These moments, perhaps they're the last, so i'll cherish 'em...

Well, singing together on stage is not something students of 10+ could do all the time,

that's why i thought at least this could be part of my ever-lasting memory when i leave school, leave home, leave friends...

Dunno, it's just...

Look, there's only around 1 year left for all of us to be together,

going to the same school, the same class, the same laboratory, the same canteen, the same toilet, everything...

and after that, it's gonna be GOODBYE,

perhaps it would be the last one you can ever say to a person,

or it might not be,

cuz we might meet each other some other day, right?

Who knows?

But, to be honest,

i just get the feeling that,

even if we did meet one another when we start college-ing/uni-ing,

we wouldn't be able to talk and chat and do stuffs we did back here at school back then...

I don't know all about these, it's all so random, again...

All i know is that,

there's not much time left for us to be together,

and that's what really matters to me, right now.

Cuz it seems like i'll lose lots of hard-earned trust and friendship once i leave school,

as i won't be studying Form 6 or whatever it is, probably...

Holy crap, i really can't believe i'm gonna be in Form 5 next year,

all the while i always thought i till have a long time and long way to go before i will study Form 5...

And now,

'Poof'', here i am, ending Form 4 in 2 weeks,

and a new school life at a different class will start, soon...

And so it's time for me to think about my career, my future,

as i haven't really thought deeply about it.

Cuz there's just so damn many jobs in the world,

and i would like to do all of 'em...

Zzz, i'm so greedy,

despite knowing that's obviously impossible...

The results for this final exams aren't that amusing,

i'm totally unsatisfied...

Well, the last time i was satisfied with my results was,

indeed, during the UPSR paper, and the years before that...

All i can say is that 'Gone were the days when he was still a hardworking boy, he's changed,

not in a positive and encouraging manner, he's become a lazy bum who' s only interested in computers and gaming consoles...'

That's why his results deteriorated, crappy results.

Damn it!

Results, they always meant somethin to him...

12.08am

11 November 09

Talk

He needs someone to talk to.

'So much to talk about, yet don't know how to start with, eh?'

Wish i could lend him a hand.

Something just so RANDOM

Dear Blog,

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to abandon you and leave you here alone for months...

I don't think i have someone to talk to, that's why i'll just utter some nonsense on a new page of you, you won't mind, would you?

Yesterday was the beginning of HAPPY DAY, (not very HAPPY, actually)

and today is the beginning of DOOMSDAY.

I thought it would be a good day today at school, although i knew it would be quite lame and boring with the award giving ceremony going on in the morning.

Yea yea~Applause, Applause and Applause...

Things then turned real bad after the ceremony and all ended, i peered at the teacher's desk with the exam score sheet on it.

Message on my head -"Oh No...."

It was Physics period soon after the long long recess, which i used the time to just stare at the same page of the Twilight novel i purchased months ago. Yes, i was looking at it, but not reading though...Physics, yea Physics...lame grades either...

But it sucks the most when the both neighbours sitting beside me got excited and made such fuss about their god damn full-marks, 40 over 40. (Yea, yea, great, cool, congrats, but just turn down your volume when you're try to celebrate)

I would have preferred if you guys who scored better grades than the others, would just shut your god-damn-mouth and stop boasting about yourself by asking how much the others got.

It's pretty irritating when i "OVERHEARD" you criticizing that girl who sits in front, it's not that i admire, adore or like her or whatsoever...

Just be humble, wouldn't you?

Besides, you were only sitting next to me and you wouldn't even bother how i felt when you were teasing the others, especially when that person was just right in front of me? Curse you!

And you wouldn't have believed this, someone proposed to come over my house and have a steamboat party. Yea, yea, BRILLIANT idea...

Who slept the earliest, remember?

Who did the cleaning then, remember?

Who played my computers when most of them were busy preparing for that steamboat, remember?

(At this point, this post sure IS a mess, so unorganized, but it can't be helped, for my feelings and thoughts are currently like that too)

I could remember myself doing the dishes that night, with some of them already asleep, some too absorbed to the movie to such extent that they didn't even notice my disappearance...

It's been so nice of you all back then, leaving the master of the house cleaning the whole mess while you were all sleeping and watching TVs...Such nice friends you all were...

I decided to get over it, but this memory of that day keeps on reappearing on my head.

Why?

Well, i don't have to answer this, do i?

Lately, someone's been a real ass.

Y. H. Y.

Yea, i know everyone knows you, so i don't have to type your full name out, right?

Such an asshole you were back then, not to mention yesterday...

You've been trying on my patience, someday, i'm gonna lose my wits and you'll regret.

I admit you do have your good qualities of being a friend,

but sometimes you are so damn annoying...

By the way, is it some random acts of kindness to lend someone your phone?

I don't think so...By that time when i was willing to 'lend' you my phone, i thought you'd return it, not OWN it.

Some of you really pisses me off, but i think it's best if no one knows about this...

I don't even know what i wrote here, as i don't even look back and check for errors in posts...

Damn It

I'm being underestimated,

and I don't like it.

[SUPER HQ] Girls' Generation (SNSD) - GEE FULL MV!!!!!!!!!

Lenglui~=]